Do You Have Busy Life Syndrome?
Doctors declare a new epidemic brought on by stress and social media
*cue sad music and concerned voice*
Did you forget to return you friend's phone call? Are you setting alarms on your phone to remind yourself of menial tasks, like taking out the trash or picking up clothes from the dry cleaners?
Have you lost your car keys?
Can't find that last pack of hot sauce from the wings spot?
Do you know where your left shoe is?
You're not alone. Dozens, hundreds and maybe even thousands of people can't find their left shoe and have no idea that it ended up in the trunk of the car they can't find the keys for. But now, finally, after years of suffering, people like you finally have an answer for why they keep forgetting to call people back and pick up that dress shirt.
You may be suffering from Busy Life Syndrome.
What is Busy Life Syndrome you ask?
Well, it's when your already hectic life of working, paying bills, raising children and watching TV gets bombarded with an influx of information from social media, smart phones and the Internet.
Here are some probable symptoms:
You know your neighbor's Twitter handle, but not his real name
Half of your work day is spent TFTing: Twitter, Facebook and Tumblr
You'll send a phone call to voice mail, but will answer a text instantly
Living out the movie "Dude, Where's My Car?" every time you enter a parking lot
“We believe there are widespread signs of the problem,” says Angela Scott-Henderson, spokesperson for CPS Research, the firm who created the term "Busy Life Syndrome." “Our attention spans and concentration levels are going down. It’s getting to be more common, affecting people at younger ages.”
Up until now we've seen studies that have people blaming social media for everything from divorce to spending more. We've even seen cases where social media is said to have negative effects on self-esteem and good manners in general. But now it's being blamed for literally losing your mind?
"What we are referring to should not be confused with the serious memory loss that is often associated with early onset dementia," says CPS Research's Dr. Alan Wade. "This study is aimed at those who are constantly losing their keys, forgetting people's names or misplacing their glasses rather than anything more serious."
While CPS says that their research only sought out to bring closure to people tired of walking into rooms and forgetting why, they aren't quick to say that BLS is a junior form of Alzhiemer's. Research shows that the biggest difference between the two is that a person with BLS realizes that they've forgot something. A person with dementia or Alzhiemer's has no idea they forgot and thinks that everything is ok until someone reminds them.
But, if BLS is a growing concern, the next question to ask is, is there a pill for it like everything else? Of course there is.
Memory pills have been available for years, but just recently they've seen a surge in sales among college students as they prepare for final exams. There have also been reports of doctors trying ADHD medicines on people who complain of memory loss. The doctors at CPS are also conducting more research to see if smaller doses of the Alzhiemer's drug memantine can help treat this disease they've come up with.
"It seems particularly far-fetched to me that this drug would be of any value," says Mayo Clinic neurologist Dr. David Knopman to NBC News. "Memantine is a drug that’s approved for the treatment for moderate to severe Alzheimer's. It’s never been tested on a large scale in normal people."
Sounds like a Chris Rock joke to us...
While "Busy Life Syndrome" could very well be an epidemic, we must realize that the cure may already be in our heads. The key word "busy" tells us all that we need to know.
The cure is shutting up, and sitting your a** down somewhere every once in a while. If you do that, you just may find all of those lost items you've been looking for.