Why Are There So Many Bad Christmas Movies?

A list of the worst Christmas movies ever made

Along with extra crowded airports there are a few other sure things we can expect each holiday season. Among them the fact that someone will manage to get offended whether we say “Merry Christmas” or “Happy Holidays,” and that for every one hit wonder that releases an ill-advised cd of Christmas classics, complete with hard rock covers of “Silent Night,” or rap versions of “Away in a Manger,” there will be several ill-advised Christmas movies. Actually there will be several terrible ones. Sometimes we get really lucky and the Santa of bad taste delivers multiple gifts in one: a bad Christmas movie featuring a soundtrack filled with bad Christmas covers too.

Before anyone begins typing “Bah-Humbug!” in the comments section, let me say for the record that I actually love Christmas movies—good ones. I don’t even have a preference for a particular type. Watching the Christmas classic “It’s a Wonderful Life,” is just as much of a holiday tradition for me as watching “The Ref,” the dark Christmas comedy featuring a hostage taker that’s become something of a cult classic over the years. And then there’s my other all-time Christmas favorite “Die Hard.” Yes you read that right. Though some forget that the action classic (which was named the greatest action film of all time by “Entertainment Weekly”) is actually a Christmas movie, it was in fact dubbed the greatest Christmas movie of all time by Empire magazine.

But for every “It’s a Wonderful Life” and “Die Hard,” there is “Silent Night Deadly Night,” a horror film in which a man dressed as Santa delivers murder and mayhem instead of presents. Despite receiving universally horrific reviews and sparking controversy upon its release for its excessive violence, for some reason, this film has managed to spawn four sequels.

Then there’s what I like to call the “…for Christmas” films. As in, “A Mom for Christmas,” “A Dad for Christmas,” “A Grandpa for Christmas,” “A Nanny for Christmas,” “A Boyfriend for Christmas,” and “A Princess for Christmas” (to name just a few.) I’ve noticed that when the two words “for Christmas,” follow something, that’s usually a sign that the movie in question is the cinematic equivalent of fruitcake: something that we all must accept as part of the holidays but accepting that fact doesn’t improve the taste.